Chinglish,they can also appear in the speech or writing of any native speaker of English who is not careful about language.For example. my American grandfather-in-law,a carpenter from rural New England,used to say."I'm going to go to work and build a set of steps"or"I'm going to go to work and shell those peas." At first I took the phrase to be an expression of the old man's admirable energy and determination.He used it so often,however, that it gradually ceased to impress me in that way.Then one after- noon when he was preparing to lie down to rest,be declared,"I'm going to go to work and take a nap."With the exception of myself,a newcomer to the family,none of his listeners noticed anything con- tradictory in the remark.It was clear that for them,as for Grandpa hinself,the oft-repeated phrase had long since lost any literal mean ing:it was only his habitual way of announcing an intended action. A warning about revision It is natural enough for unnecessary nouns and verbs to slip into a draft translation.Most often they have been dutifully carried over from the Chinese original,where they are apparently useful or,at least,tolerable.But in accordance with Professor Strunk's principle, in English they are unacceptable:"A sentence should contain no un- necessary words."When you reread your work with a critical eye,you should confidently edit them out. A word of warning,however.First,you have to make sure that the words are indeed"unnec."With a few exceptions,all of the phrases discussed so far sometimes have real content.While three times out of four they are mere cotton padding,the fourth time they may convey an element of meaning that would otherwise be lacking. 14
In that case,of course,they should be allowed to stand. For example,the noun phrase expressing time is not always re- dundant with the verb tense:"at present it is necessary to."may mean that the necessity is ony temporary.The usually worthless cat- egory noun can occasionally perform a valid function:"in accordance with the principle of self-reliance,all army units should." Phrases such as"make great efforts to,""pay attention to,"and "do a good job in"are sometimes perfectly legitimate:"we must make great efforts in education"conveys meaning.And even when such a phrase serves to introduce another verb,it is not necessarily superfluous:"we must make great efforts to overcome this difficulty" may indicate that the task will be particularly arduous. This means that whenever you come across one of these suspect phrases in a draft translation,you are called upon to make a judgment.In context,is it justified?Is it necessary for the sense of the passage?Or has it been put into the English version simply be- cause it was present in the Chinese? Consider"the bourgeoisie followed a policy of vacillating."The statement is absurd in English,because to vacillate-that is,to be undecided,to alternate between different positions,to lean now this way and now that-is,precisely,to have no policy.Not only do the words add nothing to the meaning but,as in Grandpa's"I'm go- ing to go to work and take a nap,"they actually contradict it. Plainly,they should be deleted ("the bourgeoisie vacillated").But how about "China has always followed a policy of peaceful coexistence"?That statement makes sense,and here the words are essential to express the meaning.Plainly,they should be retained. 15
Sometimes,however,the choice is not so clear.What should be done,for example,with "we must follow the policy of putting quali- ty first"?Was the phrase used in Chinese only from force of habit?Is this just Chinglish for"we must always put quality first"?Or did the writer really mean to stress the notion of a policy?Perhaps we should keep the "policy"and even recast the sentence to emphasize it:"we must make it our policy to put quality first."The translator must de- cide. Machines have been devised to perform certain types of transla- tion,but they cannot distinguish between meaningful and meaning- less uses of the same phrase.That is the difference between you and a machine. Twenty more examples of revision Here are twenty more examples of superfluous nouns and verbs, together with suggested revisions. In the A-versions the unnecessary nouns and verbs are under- lined.In the revisions some of them were simply deleted;others were replaced by different words,and the new versions are italicized.The comments in brackets at the end of each example explain the reasons the changes were made.(The explanations in parentheses refer to other faults that were corrected in addition to those discussed in this chapter.） Note that in every case the edited version is not only shorter but also simpler and easier to understand. 1)A:when making revolution in Guangzhou in the past,we were young and arrogant B:when we were making revolution in Guangzhou,we were 6
young and arrogant [The past tenses of the verbs ("were making"and "were") suffice to place the action"in the past."] 2)A:this accounts for the inadequate efficiency in the performance of their duties B:this accounts for their inefficiency People's "efficiency"normally refers to the way they do their work (perform their duties),so there is no need to spell it out. 3)A:these nine years constitute a period in which the national eco- nomic strength has increased B:in these nine years the economy has grown stronger [-"Constitute a period in which"is mere filler,adding noth- ing to the sense of "nine years." -("National"was omitted in the revised version because it is assumed that“the economy”means the national economy,）] 4)A:it is also necessary to put an end to the situation in which the leading organizations accompany the guerrilla units here and there B:also,leading organizations should stop accompanying the guerrilla units wherever they go ["Situation"adds nothing but a more complicated sentence structure."We must put an end to the situation in which students are late for class"is only a roundabout way of saying"students must stop being late for class."] 5)A:the reason why the contracts are so lifeless and out of gear with actual conditions lies in the fact that the trade union 17
leadership didn't understand that. B:the reason the contracts are so lifeless and unrelated to actual conditions is that the trade union leadership didn't under- stand that. [Professor Strunk is particularly stern in his condemnation of the expression"the fact that."He says unequivocally [p. 24],"It should be revised out of every sentence in which it occurs." 6)A:the Civil Aviation Administration of China has decided to start the business of advance booking and ticketing on connect- ing and return flights B:the Civil Aviation Administration of China has decided to start advance booking and ticketing for connecting and return flights ["The business of"is an unnec.category noun. 7)A:The efforts.are all focused on the objective of effectively strengthening the vitality of large and medium-sized state- owned enterprises. B:The efforts.are all focused on revitalieing (or:designed to revitalize)large and medium-sized state-owned enter- prises. [-"The objective of"is another unnec.category noun. .“To strengthen vitality"=“to revitalize”（pattern: unnec.verb noun). -("Effectively"was edited out because to "revitalize"means to revitalize "effectively.")] 8)A:the main forces of the East China Field Army marched down south into the Henan-Anhui-Jiangsu plains in order to